I just ran for about 7 hours and did 46 miles. The break up is 46 miles of moving in 6:59:33, plus about 10mins of changing shoes, opening and drinking soup, etc. I am super excited, because this run was really easy physically. The strain was convincing my brain to start another trip out my garage after having run 33 miles and 5hrs. I was thinking that was enough...but... yeah for sticking with it... I needed to go for 7hrs. I am thinking I will do a 100miler in 3 weeks. Just for fun and with the only goal being to finish. So today was key. Amazingly I ran a pretty even pace the whole time. I felt like I could have kept that same pace going...not sure tell when. But at least another 10ish miles.
What I learned:
1. I like the Pearls better for super long stuff. They keep my legs and back feeling less strained.
2. DRINK, DRINK, electrolytes, DRINK. Maybe 2 cups an hour and one pill for every 2-3 cups.
3. I like to eat plain bread and soup.
4. Eating so a must! I could feel the difference when I went over 10miles w/o food. I should be eating more often. Like every hour.

So I got in a fun run and learned a lot about running long today. What a good day. And I still have Jenna's wedding to go to! Yeah for weddings!!!!

Bandera 2009

What a race!! What an awesome, butt kicking race. I registered for the 100k wanting to run better then I did last year. This was a very realistic goal, because I ran last year underprepared for that mileage and without electrolytes on a hot day. But I all told, my mental game got me through with a good finish of 11:25. This year, things had potential to go awesome for me. But I pushed my body too hard in training, didn't allow myself adequate recovery time from injures, and ended up toeing the line of this 100k VERY untrained. But I had to try. All year long my biggest running goal has been to run under 11hrs on this course. I know I am very capable of doing it. But the training needs to be there. After running an easy 50k in 5:15, I was ready to quit. My ankles and knees were hurting on the down hills in a way that I could tell was warning of injury. My body just wasn't ready to take the pounding that course gives it. Too bad. Yesterday was just a great day for that course in so many ways. The ground was dry, there was a little cloud cover, and the high was only in the upper 50's. The only draw back was the wind gusts on the flats. But I had to give it a go. I am glad I did. Knowing I wasn't ready beats wondering if I could have done it.
A giant congrats to the female winners. Marcy Beard (1st) just ran awesome. She gutted out that second 50k, passing the 2end (Liza Howard-11:48) and 4th (Bridget DeLaRosa, also under 12hrs) place females. Melissa Heggen just rocked all day, scoring a PR in the 11s and placing 3erd female. GO LADIES!!!!! That course kicks butt, and you gals kicked its right back!!

Bandera is Coming

I am planing on racing the 100k this Saturday at Bandera. Give all or crash trying. Truthfully, I think I can do this. I feel unprepared, but I have never run this race prepared. I might even be more prepared to cover the distance this year then in the last 2 years. But that course is tough. My legs might not handle the pounding well with the layoff I had. In any case, I am going to try! I am excited to try. If I have to drop, then I will see about training for Rocky Raccoon 100. But I think I can do it!!!!

Where am I at

This past month or so has been hard for me. My running has been close to nil. And my mood has been gloomy because of this lingering injury. It all started this past summer. I ran a race in August while I had some tightness in my left foot and calf. While running this night trail race in the rain and mud, I jammed my ankle bad. Well, I thought I jammed my ankle. The sport doc I saw on November 24th said I broke that ankle. No wonder it is still sore. Apparently, all the running I was doing with a broken left ankle caused me to put stress on my right thigh/ hip area, causing a "stress spot". Luckily I didn't push hard enough to fracture my thigh. But I've had to take a break from running. For 2 weeks I ran nothing, and for the next to weeks I ran very little. This past week I have been able to get in some good runs. Only if I want to race Bandera on January 10th, it is now tapper time. Truthfully, my training has been spotty since June. I have a fuzzy idea of where I am at in terms of my running right now. I love running. I love pushing myself hard. I want to feel my physical limits and then push through them mentally. If I run the 50k or the 100k at Bandera, I can- will have to- push hard. That course is a butt kicker. And so fun. Rocky, hilly, and the weather is always a surprise. Maybe 81 degrees with out a cloud for cover. Maybe 29 and rainy, or any where in between. I'd have fun just being out there helping with the race. So what do I do? 50k or 100k? 2 weeks to decide.

This Maze

I have a very rough version of this song. I have been wanting to work on the instrumental for this and flesh it out before I posted it. This song has a lot of meaning for me and it is so far from finished. Being a mom is such a strange blessing...I love my kid and am more grateful to God for them then words or even music could ever say. But it is a hard blessing. I think mothers and fathers of multiple little children will get this song. But I know not everyone will. Here is what I have now, minus the melody.

I'm Staring at the writing on my wall,

wanting Lord to see your hand.

I feel myself, I'm crumbling beneath the weight,

of these Gifts that You gave me.

And I don't know why....Please open my eyes.

'Cause I'm blinded by what's here and now,

this destruction so confusing.

I've lost Your way looking for an out.

Can't take what You gave me.

I'm lonely, and never alone.

Little touches bring insanity.

I'm running, but I don't want out.

I just need You to save me.

Keep me lost in this maze.

Don't let me find my way out.

My dreams are dying,

wish I was flying...

Over these walls.

I know You have a plan for me,

and these children You gave me.

But I'm confused and lost inside.

It's hard for me to see You,

through my flooded room,

and emptied cupboards.

I don't understand,

why You've made me their mother.

I'm so lost in this maze.

I can't find my way out.

My dreams are dying.

Wish I was flying...

Over these walls.

I'm trying hard.

You've made me so weak.

Lord help me be, the mom they need me to be.

Keep me lost in this maze.

Don't let me find my way out.

Catch me Lord.

I need your strength to make it through these days.

Lord, let me see Your hand in the writing on my wall.

Sometime in Spring, 2007

My Boys, continued.

I was tiered. And, as too many of my stories start out, I decided to take a nap. I know what you're thinking. Foolish mom. And I am. I knew something could happen if I took my eyes of those two boys for 10minutes. But sleep got the best of me.

When I woke up, my boys (4 and 3) were playing sweetly on my floor. Few, I thought. I got a little nap and nothing is the worse for it. I headed into the pantry to see what I had to make for dinner. Hum....not much. Could have sworn I had more stuff in here...guess I did a pore job at the shopping this week. Looks like it has to be leftovers tonight.

As I heated spaghetti and meat sauce in the microwave, my husband got home for work. Normally I get a kiss first thing. This day I got, "Have you been in the garage?"

Puzzled, I followed Dan back out into the garage. Then I saw why my cupboards were so bear. Why hadn't I realized it before? My boys had raided my pantry. There, on the floor of the garage, hidden to one side of our car, was a giant pretzel tub full of...my pantry. They had taken oatmeal, flour (whole wheat and white), sugar (brown and granulated), pudding mixes, crystal light mix, Gatorade's, malted vinegar, baking soda, baking powder, a box of kosher salt, and a brand new giant bottle of extra virgin olive oil and mixed it all together. I was at my whits end. These two sooooo knew not to do this. In fact, a few weeks earlier they had done the same thing on a much smaller scale and been punished for it (last time it was only the flours and water).

We called the boys into the garage for a talk.
Their side: We wanted to bake a cake. We were making a cake.
Did you know this was a bad idea? "Yes. But we like baking..." said 4 year old Everett.
"Then lets bake your cake," I said. Everett looked horrified. I calmly walked to the oven and turned it on. Then I pored as much of that nasty stuff as I could fight into my biggest cake pan. "There is too much here to bake. Would you guys like some of the leftovers?" Everett, still looking in shock, shook his head no. Caedmon said he wanted some. I put some in a bowl for Caed, but he didn't try it.
When the cake was done, I put two pieces on the table for my boys and spaghetti on the table for Seren, Dan, and myself. The boys didn't say a word for a long time. Finally, Everett asked for some spaghetti. "Sorry, honey. I don't want to wast all that stuff. It is going to cost me a lot of money to replace all the things you boys used today. So I think you will need to eat this until it is gone."
Everett look beyond puzzled. "But we don't know how to make a cake," he said.
"So remember not to try to bake without mommy helping. Mommy does know how." my husband responded.
"I want to try it." Said Caed.
"Go ahead, Caed. I tried it," I told him,"it isn't very good."
Caed picked up a piece with his fork.
"NOOO! DON"T CAED! IT'S POISON!! WE MADE A POISON CAKE!" shouted Everett. It was all I could do to not laugh.
"It isn't poison. Only yucky."
Caed tried the cake. Then drink a lot of water. "It taste like yucky dough." He told Everett.
But there was no convincing Everett.

When the boys woke up the next morning, they asked for oatmeal. I reminded them about the cake. All our oatmeal was in that cake. They decided breakfast no longer sounded good. So i gave then both a giant cup of milk.

I also sent a piece of this cake with Everett to preschool. Harsh? No. Not if you know Everett. He need this bounder set firm. After I dropped Everett off at his class, I found the preschool director and told her what had happened and what was in Everett's lunch box. I also apologized for having not reminded Everett about this being his lunch and explained my feelings about this boundary. It wasn't that I wanted Everett to eat only this cake, but I couldn't give him any thing else yet. The director got a laugh about it and said she would be glad to help out.

When I picked up the boy's, I found out that the director had lunch in Everett's class. She said when he opened up the Tupperware and saw the cake inside, his eyes about popped out of his head. She questioned him about it, but he didn't want to talk. Thinking the cake looked pretty good, she asked for a bit (I promise I told her what was in it!!). Her report: that was the nastiest stuff ever. Like baked throw-up. She also shared her lunch with Everett. (My boys go to the BEST preschool, boy the way.)

When the boy's got home, I told them I had thrown out the cake. I told them that any time they ever did something like this again, there would be similar consequences. And I hugged them and offered them some real food. So far, we haven't had another pantry raid.
(But before this they took the eggs! Now I remember! The "stinky cat food"!! I will write that next time.)

More stories about my boys

AKA- the partners in crime. My boys are truly amazing. They are determined, dedicated, persistent, creative, smart, and incredibly strong. They aren't afraid of anything (except monsters at night) and haven't met a challenge they are unwilling to pursue. I truly believe God has big plans for those two little men in in the making. But parenting them is no picnic. As much as I love them and feel a deep sense of honor in being given the responsibility of raising them, they push me right onto the edge of my sanity line. To give you a bit of insight into my world as their Mother, and to give myself some comic relief, I will attempt to recall some of the most challenging and scary moments I have faced raising my 5 and 4 year old boys to date.

February 2004
Everett was almost 1 and Seren, my daughter was 2 1/2. It was a Friday at our house in Austin. I know it was a Friday because Fridays were trash and recycle days for our neighborhood back then. After feeding the kids breakfast, I went to my room to go to the bathroom. Even moms have to take potty breaks once in awhile. We may be able to warred of sickness and see things with the backs of our heads, but we are, after all, still human. Maybe 2 minutes after I lift my kids playing in the living area, Seren comes into my bathroom and says, "Mommy, Everett is walking in the street."
"Well tell him no, no. We can't walk in the street," I say thinking Seren is playing a game. We play lots of pretend games like that with our children to help them learn about safety. Seren ran out of the bathroom. She was back in less then a minute.
"I told him, but he's not listening to me." (Side note. Seren is very verbal. At the age of 1 she asked a friend of mine, "Do you have cheese in the fridge, 'cause I like cheese." My friend and I got a kick out of it)
At this point I had the stomach turning thought that this might not be a game. I flew out of my bathroom, down the hall, and through the OPENED FRONT DOOR. My sweet little 11 month old was waddling down the middle the street, empty gallon of milk in hand, clad only in his little Bummies diaper, and headed straight for the recycle truck. This tiny little guy had unlocked and opened the front door all by himself. I was shocked! Seren, while capable of unlocking bolted doors, would never have done so. She knew, some how, not to. But Everett...he will try anything. I called my husband and told him what had happened. By 6pm that evening we had chains on the top of all doors that exited out house.